Learner’s Permit In Progress

When my eldest beast was about to turn 15 I realized I could probably use his learner’s permit as a new point of leverage.  Whoa — was I wrong.   Apparently not all teens are as pumped about driving as we were back in the day.  I found an article that says less than a 1/3 of teens age 16 have their licenses… so now where’s my leverage?

At first I was pleased that he chose parent-taught driver’s ed over the $400 driving school.  Then, I realized he chose parent-taught because he was in no rush — so much so that he wouldn’t start the online modules.   I realized, the driver’s ed was leverage for HIM, not me….

Switch tactics.  Once his 15th birthday came and went, I knew I had to take action.  This kid was going to do his online modules and get his learner’s permit!!!  So I sweetly walked into his room a week or so after his birthday had passed and this is what I shared with him:

Me, “It’s funny. I was thinking, I bet you didn’t know how much like your mom you are?”

Him, “What do you mean?”

Me, “I was just like you when I was your age.  I had a friend who made me go take my driver’s test because I didn’t care about getting my license.  I always had people to drive me around, so it didn’t matter to me either.”

Him, no response, silence.

Me, “I never thought about it until now, but we are more alike than I realized.”  Then I walked out.

He was online doing the modules the very next day.  Today, I am happy to report he drives quite willingly and recently even scolded me for not offering the keys to him before I got in to drive.  I’m not saying I’m brilliant or anything, but just that the theory is true… no kid wants to be like their parent until much later in life when they realize it is inevitable.  But at 15, there is no way in their mind that is ever going to happen.

And that, my friends, is leverage.

Parenting Tip:  If you are aware of your own weaknesses, you can learn from those to make your kids stronger.

[Ezekiel 18:19-20  Yet you ask, ‘Why does the son not share the guilt of his father?’ Since the son has done what is just and right and has been careful to keep all my decrees, he will surely live.  The one who sins is the one who will die. The child will not share the guilt of the parent, nor will the parent share the guilt of the child. The righteousness of the righteous will be credited to them, and the wickedness of the wicked will be charged against them.]

Playing Jacks While What?

You get to a point where you think you can’t be shocked any more.  And then your family friend uses the facilities in your home and reports there are jacks on the bathroom floor.  Huh?  I have two beasts — no daughters.   And on the bathroom floor?

Then you’re embarrassed, amazed and a little grossed out to learn that one of your beasts plays with them in order to pass the time while on the toilet.  Yes, you read it correctly.  While on the toilet… he’s playing jacks.  So weird.  Inexplicable how these ideas come into their head.  It’s just not normal.

Parenting Tip:  Keep your sense of humor.

Psalms 37:8  Refrain from anger and turn from wrath; do not fret—it leads only to evil.

They’re Not My Socks

Father Beast’s socks

Wife to Father Beast, “Whose socks are these on the floor?”

Father Beast to wife, “Not mine, they must be our eldest beast’s.”

“Eldest beast, are these yours?”

Eldest beast, “No, I don’t wear socks like those. Those are Daddy’s.”

“Honey, look at these socks.  Aren’t they yours?”

“No, I haven’t worn white socks all weekend,” as wife lifts socks to show Father Beast.  ”Oh, wait.  Those look like mine.  Yeah, maybe I did wear socks like that recently. Oh, yeah — those are mine.”

Eldest beast’s socks

As I turn to walk away, I see the eldest beast’s socks on the floor on other side of the room. Ugh.  Welcome to Sunday night at my house.

Another Mother’s Pain

A balancing act

Today I am sharing a photo from my friend’s home.  This image displays a very impressive skill that has been genetically transferred from father to son.  Balance.  A skill that not only requires a steady hand, perseverance and intention, but also a deep desire to give each trash bag its full potential for efficiency and use.

You see, some may erroneously believe this trashcan is full and needs to be emptied.  But in my friend’s home, the beasts of the house are well aware that there is still a place for the next piece of refuse.  Clearly there is space within that chip bag to insert… say, a napkin?  And behind that artfully teetering stack of plates, I can see how maybe a cup or empty soda can can be wedged into that area.   Oh no, this trashcan cannot possibly be full.

In fact, if you look up the word full you’ll find Webster’s New Collegiate tells us that ‘full’ means, “containing as much or as many as is possible or normal.”  So it sounds like her beasts are not really being unreasonable, or are they?  Just keep in mind that the key word in this definition is ‘normal’… and normal is relative.

Parenting Tip: Set a bounty of $1 per item that falls off the trash pile. If it touches the floor, they pay $1.

[John 10:9b "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."]

Why is it?

Toilet time is private time

Why is it that kisses from mommy suddenly become gross, but talking to her face-t0-face while she’s on the toilet is completely acceptable?